Thank you for sticking with me! The holidays were rough if I’m being completely transparent. It was a lot of socializing, and I don’t know about you, but I am still acclimating to post covid life. It’s so hard to believe that we are just a few months shy of four years. It’s proof that we can get through the hard stuff! While we were going through it, it seemed like forever that we would get back to some sort of normalcy if that is really even a thing.
Whatever happened last year, if it was difficult, my hope for you in this year, is that your heart will find some peace around it. There was so much loss and sadness for myself and those around me and being an empath, it is hard for me to separate what are my feelings verses those of my loved ones.
Our family of five years separated and that was so hard to get used to. I loved having a partner in life and the security of knowing we were safe. There is a vulnerability around being without a covering that is hard us to get used to. While there is peace around the situation, it does not take away from missing what was even if you know it’s what needed to happen. Navigating my little one’s emotions has been a roller coaster. I have no ill will over the situation as a matter of fact I’m grateful for the experience and memories but it’s hard to explain even when I am honest about it all.
I lost one of my closet friends this year to breast cancer and lost a close one the year before. I am learning that not everyone in our lives is meant to stay. Some are here for a moment and even with a short amount of time, they make the biggest impact or move us forward in that chapter. I missed being with our other family and that one was hard to explain to my kiddo when he asked, “why can’t I be with dad and poppo and everyone?” I don’t know! I didn’t know how to break my babies’ heart, so I just said, I don’t know.
We did a lot of things to keep our minds busy. We kept with the traditions that are in my scope and I worked to create new ones. I’ve been here before where it feels like the shoe has dropped and the parent who is left picks up the pieces. It’s like a death of sorts but they are still alive. I want to believe, even with the hiccups of life, this may have been the most magical Christmas for him. The happiness on his face and gratitude for what I was able to do meant the world.
I hope that if your heart is heavy missing someone, that you are able to make the best of this moment, taking one step at a time, and keeping what memories you have of them deep within your heart.
All my love!
JennieV
Words with jenniev 